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The Sugar Daddy Files - Volume I

Sup, Nerds.

Its 7pm on a Thursday night…normally I’d be on my way out to Planet Rock to get my climb on, but on this particular Thursday, I was in my car headed in a different direction. Instead of going to meet a group of twenty to thirty something normal climbers, I was headed to meet my 44 year old lawyer Sugar Daddy for the first time.

I had taken all of the necessary precautions…meeting in public, parking in a lit area, letting a few friends know where I was and making sure that I contacted them throughout the night. Despite the numerous precautions, I was still shakingly nervous. If any of the guys that I’ve been meeting online was going to hack me up…I really felt like it would be this guy.

So back up to how we first interacted. The first message I got from this guy was… “You’re so pretty!! I want you to be my sugar baby and I will treat you so well!!” Direct…cool. I totally ignored the message thinking...ew, weird. But after about a week he emailed me again… “Please let me take you out and spoil you rotten. I just want to be your sugar daddy!!” Again, I ignored the message and he left me alone for about a month before I got one last message… “Dinner sometime? Anywhere you want!! You’re just so pretty I want to treat you like a queen!” Ok. Maybe just maybe I could try this and just see what the hell happens? I did say that I was willing to experience every kind of relationship out there…and Sugar Daddy/Baby is a growing relationship trend. Maybe there's something to it?

So sure enough, about a week later, I’m on my way to meet this clown. I’ve gone from letting trouble find me, to going out and meeting trouble at an Italian restaurant.

So yeah, he was creepy, but not as creepy as I thought. He’s not one to hack you up…probably more one to invite you over for a nice bottle of wine, put poison in your glass and then have sex with your dead body. I think I can deal with that more than being hacked up.

Dinner was nice…good wine, good food. He definitely botoxes which makes him have a really creepy smile and during any pause in the conversation he’d give me these side glance smiles that totally said, I’m thinking about you naked.  He asked me if I would wear a school girl’s outfit and said that he loves that I look even younger than 22. Then at the end of the night, he gave me the most molest-tastic hug/kiss ever. It gave the guy who gave me a 10 hug to absorb my positive energy a run for his money. I’ve never had my hair pulled during a first kiss…but hey, whatever floats his boat.

So that was kind of weird. But my question, because I don’t know how this all works… is he thinking that I'm actually going to sleep with him? He’s not bad looking, but can’t I just get spoiled for being arm candy? Do I really have to sleep with the guy? I don’t know if that’s gonna happen. But you better believe that I’m going to stretch this out for analysis…and maybe a pair of Jimmy Choos…

I’ll keep ya posted.

Moslist-tastic hugs,

Slugs

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